Laissez les bons temps roulez.
I remember that from a tee shirt that my sister had from Mardi Gras or one of the other numerous holidays that she spent festivitying in Nawlins. It always struck me as sounding so exotic. I used to repeat it over and over again, hoping I sounded authentic and not knowing what it meant.
Well, let the good times roll. I'm en route to the United States and having a pretty good time relaxing. It's different than relaxing in site or having a day where I don't do anything but still stay in Las Pozas. In site, I'm still technically ''on call'' whenever a situation may arise. Out of site and on a legitimate, official vacation there's literally nothin' I can do if it's 9:00 pm and someone needs me to type a letter for the mayor that they need to turn in tomorrow. For example.
So! Really enjoying the time that I'm spending right now in San José. I got here yesterday and I am staying with my boyfriend's sister's family. My boyfriend has begun work in a call center in San José and is living with his sister (be reeeeally nice to the person on the other end of the line when your AT&T network coverage stops working on your iPhone 4). His sister is awesome and so is her husband and their kids. I usually feel like I can't relax in other people's homes when I'm spending the night and I thought I would be more like that with the family of someone really important to me. But since I got here I've only felt like...totally and completely part of the family. Except at meal times when I'm told to relax and not do anything but hey. That's not so bad.
Where am I going from here? Well this afternoon there's cafecito with a Spanish teacher that I had during training. After that we'll probably mosey on back to the house. Tomorrow at midday I go to Liberia and that's where my flight leaves from on Monday afternoon. Liberia's a big town to be in alone, but mom-in-the-states has agreed to call to keep my mind of my travel anxieties. Although...she might not be the best person for that. Upon finding out that I was going to be staying alone in a hotel in Liberia she blurted out, ''Well, do you know how to get out in case of a fire?!''
...What? I mean, yeah, I guess, you...it involves opening doors and running, right? Anyway, then a conversation ensued which was longer than it needed to be (more than 5 seconds) about how the plane could crash and there's only so many things I have control over - hotel fires and falling from the sky being two things that I cannot, indeed, control.
That was Thursday night, before I came to San José. Around 6 pm. And after I hung up the phone I looked around my house and thought, ''Okay. I'm packed.'' I was mistaken. A stream of family members came by in pairs and threes to bring me small ceramic turtles, other ceramic pieces that they had in their homes, carved artisan guacales (huuuuge tree seeds), bags of coffee and even homemade bread. All of these are ''for your mother'' or ''for your aunt because she sent that dress for the baby.''
These are the same people that for the past two weeks I've been thinking, ''I just don't know what to do. I am exhausted, tired of trying to be creative and I don't want to see people anymore unless they're ready to actually DO SOMETHING for their community.'' The past two weeks I've found myself questioning my commitment, becoming frustrated easily with the smallest tasks and generally writing off my community as a town that doesn't care about me or what I have to say - so why should I care about the people in it? Crying a lot, calling home and wondering if going home on vacation is a good idea or not...would I come back? And if I'm wondering if I am coming back, then isn't that a sign that I shouldn't? I was absolutely destroying my mood and my mind with this line of thoughts.
And then, people showed up at my house with stuff for my mom. Like, Las Pozas isn't nearly as poor as some regions in Africa. That's a given. But there's still not a whole lot to spare. And the readiness to part with something that's belonged to their family for a long time to send it, with love, to the United States, or to grab a bag of coffee off their shelf...that makes all of my self-centered pushy work oriented crap disappear. Like a puff of smoke. I felt like I exhaled and let all of it go in the moment that people stopped by to say goodbye and to give me a blessing for my trip. ''Que Dios me la guarde y que me la protege.'' That God should guard her and keep her safe for me.
And now I just think...oh my God, there is not a thing I wouldn't do to show how much I love them in return.
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